Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Heart Vs. Mind...which would you choose?


When a person is deciding which paths to take in life, there is never an easy answer.  Whether one chooses to make decisions based on logic, or trusting in their heart to guide them, it will result in the outcome of their future.  I prefer to trust my heart to guide me, treating it as my god, and making decisions based on the faith that my conscience will lead me to make the right decision.  Our minds arefilled with useful information that has been learned over the years, which can help a person to make
positive decisions based on logic; however, this can result in a set way of thinking for an individual.  When a person trusts in their heart, they are able to be more creative, thinking outside of the box, with the belief that faith will guide them.
                There are both good and bad aspects when choosing whether to follow your heart or your head when it comes to making decisions on the job.  I always believe that following your heart is best; however, I work in an environment that consists of helping today’s youth; therefore, my situation could be a little different from most people.  People who consider others feelings tend to use their hearts to guide them.
These people are usually more patient, honest, and understanding.  These people take the time to Understand how others are feeling, which helps them to sympathize and empathize with the people around them.  This means that they are better able to build strong, lasting relationships.  These people also tend to have a more positive outlook on life, seeming to always do what is best for everyone around them, which forms healthy work environments.  With this comes respect for one another, and they are able to work as a team who supports and encourages one another.  Some downsides of thinking with your heart on the job is one may not get promoted because they are trusting in their hearts to guide them, rather than listening to what they have been taught or told by a boss.  People who trust in their hearts to make decisions on the job can also tend to be walked on by other employees as they are always willing to put others first, even if it compromises their own chances for advancement.  For these people, success is achieved within themselves, in the here and now.  Their achievement is based upon their personal integrity, rather than achieving advancement in the work place.

                When a person chooses to use their brains on the job, a lot of times they are basing their decisions on theories of others.  This can be an easier route for a person to take because they are following a set of rules or guidelines that has been set up by others in the field.  The problem with this is that it can keep a person from trying new techniques, or coming up with new ideas that may be more beneficial to a company.  This could take away a person’s Individuality, and keep them from coming up with creative alternatives.  These types of people tend to be very task oriented, great at planning, and value procedure.  When a person uses their brains, they are more likely to get raises or promoted, because they are not questioning authority.  People who think with their brains are also very goal driven, and success oriented.  They are always thinking for the future, and finding ways to advance in their career field.  This can be a great thing for this person; however, how many feet would they possibly step on to gain advancement in a company? 

                Should I listen to my brain, or follow my heart?  This is a dilemma I have encountered a few times at my job as a teacher/counselor aid at Pressley Ridge.  One incident I will describe for you happened about a year ago.  A youth was having a problem and decided that she was going to run.  This could be a dangerous risk for everyone involved; therefore, usually requires the youth to be restrained.  Instead of restraining her, I ran behind her while constantly talking to her, encouraging her to stop and talk with me. After a mile or two, the youth stopped running, and decided to discuss her problems.  About 30 minutes into processing with the youth, I realized that I had better contact my supervisor on the radio to let him know where the youth and I were located.  The supervisor gave me orders to notify the youth that she could either return to group at that moment, or I was to force her back.  I contemplated this situation for a moment, and although I 100% respect my supervisor, I knew the youth needed some time away from group.  I decided to trust my heart, and made my own decision to stay where we were until I felt that the youth was emotionally stable.  In the months that the youth had been at Pressley Ridge, we had been led to believe that her father was sexually abusing her for many years.  The only problem was that the youth refused to admit it to any authorities, so nothing was ever done to get her out of the house.  I also knew that within the next few months, the youth would be going back to live with her father, and be back in the same abusive environment.  I knew in my mind that I should follow my orders, and that it was a possibility that if I didn’t, I could get fired; however, I knew in my heart that I could get through to this youth.  I also knew that forcing her back wouldn’t help her situation.  I utilized the time I had with the youth as best as I could.  I reassured her that it was not her fault.  I reminded her that no one has to go through that kind of pain and that she shouldn’t be ashamed.  I also explained to her the importance of getting help, and gaining control in her life.  I then educated her on the options she would have, and routes that she could take if she ever decided that she wanted out of the abusive situations, she never admitted the abuse to me, but I could see the pain in her eyes when we were talking.  I know that one day she will have the strength to stand up for herself, and when she does; I feel that I educated her on the best way to go about doing it.  This is a situation where I had to use my heart, instead of my head.  I knew that my choice could possibly leave me without a job, but I knew that I had to do what I came to work for Pressley Ridge for, which was to help the youth instead of worrying about what my future held.

                When it comes to love and relationships, I believe that the mind can be deceiving.  Our minds, through many years on this earth, have come up with perceived notions on the type of person that we should be with.  It can expect certain things from a person, or a relationship, causing one to forget what the most important aspect of a relationship it, heartfelt connection!  Our minds can tell us that we are attracted to a certain type of person based on their looks, employment, religion, or culture.  It can tell us that we should be with someone because our family wants us to, and we want to please them.  It can tell you that you should be with someone, who has a good job, just for the simple fact that you will be financially secure. The mind also tends to contemplate decisions, such as allowing one to think that that divorce is okay because so many people do it these days.  In other words, our minds tell us what we need to be happy.  This can keep a person from remembering what love is all about, compromise.   True love comes from the pounding of your heartbeat when you touch, or the way you get all warm and child like when you look into their eyes.  A mind will forget those things, but a heart never will.                                   

`When a person makes decisions with their heart, they are able to build a future based on the love alone.  This person seeks the immediate spark with a person that leads to an eternal connection.  They look into their mates eyes, and they can see their soul.  They can take one look at their spouses face and it would be like reading a book, they would know everything the person was thinking without them ever saying a word.  They can feel one another’s joy and pain, almost as though they are one.  Material things don’t matter, because life wouldn’t be worth living if you couldn’t share it with that one specific person.  This person doesn’t care what they are doing, or where they are, as long as they are doing it with the one they love.  With trusting in your heart, love knows no boundaries.  When you trust from the heart, there is no pre conceived notion about how the person should be.  Instead, a person feels that spark with one special someone that ignites the fire, and is willing do anything to fuel the fire to keep it alive.  This helps give them the faith that they can overcome any obstacle set in their path, and that love is never ending.  Divorce is never an option, but rather they can succeed through communication and compromise.  People who love from their heart always consider how the other person would feel; therefore there is never even a thought of adultery.  When thinking with your heart, one realized that life is not always joyful.  They understand that with life comes pain and obstacles, but through conquering these things together, they are able to strengthen their bond.  We all know the difference between right or wrong.  It is sort of like good and evil.  Minds tend to contemplate decisions but your heart always knows the difference between right and wrong.              

                Think for a moment about life in general.  There is so much separation between people because of religion, culture, influences, ambitions, and upper forces.  Everyone wants to use their minds.  They want to figure others out.  They want to make demands.  They want to tell others how they should think, and react.  They want to solve problems, and gain knowledge into unknown aspects of reality.  This is all fine, but what consequences will this have on others?  There is so much evil out there.  Wars going on, bombs possibly ready to drop, and people seeking revenge.  Now imagine if all these people made decisions based solely on their hearts.  If these people did not pay attention to what they have been told to do by others, how they have been treated in the past, or trying to justify the reasons for their behaviors.  How would this affect the future of mankind?  Every person should make decisions based on how their choices would affect others.  A person who thinks with their mind would find ways to justify their behaviors.  People who trust in their hearts always know the difference between right and wrong, and choose to not place harm upon anyone, no matter what the situation or reasoning is.      

                No matter how a person chooses to make their decisions, whether mind or heart, they all do so with the hope of creating a better future for themselves.  Either way, the person is hoping to create a legacy for their families, and to gain knowledge that can be passed down to future generations.  Whether a person thinks with their minds, or follows their hearts, they are trying to make positive decisions in their lives,
while creating their own destinies, with hopes for successful future.

                As an example, just imagine that you are on your way to a very important job interview, or a final exam for a class.  Pretend that you have been told that if you do not make this interview or exam, you will not get the job, or you will fail the class.  You are driving on the highway, and running late for your appointment.  You come across an elderly woman on the side of the road with a flat tire.  A person who thinks with their mind will probably say to themselves:    I must get to school/work because this could mean I may not graduate or get that great job.  This will result in me living at home longer, not being financially secure, and missing a wonderful opportunity.  The person who thinks with their heart will say to themselves:   this lady needs help, what if she doesn’t have a cell phone, what if a bad person stops to help her.  The person who thinks with their mind will probably put their own needs first and keep moving forward to their appointment.  Most likely they will wonder, for a long time to come, whether or not the little old lady made it home safe.  The person who thought with their heart will stop and help the little old lady.  Although they will not get the job, or possibly not graduate, they will feel completely fulfilled.  They will be upset that they did not get the job, or pass the test, but they will feel fulfilled just by knowing that they did what was right.  Any mature person wants a good job, and to graduate but they also realize that there is still plenty of time in the future to accomplish those dreams  A person is only given one chance to make the right decision.  You can always take those tests, and there will be other job interviews in the future, but you can’t go back and change the fact that you didn’t help that little old lady.  Just something to think about.                                                                           

People are faced with making decisions on a daily basis, in hopes of gaining self-worth; however, every person has their own views about self-worth.  For some it may be gaining knowledge, achieving goals and success, wealth, and maybe even power, all which are accomplished by using our minds/brains.  For me self-worth is attained by following my heart, knowing that I use my heart as my God, thinking about how my decisions will affect others, and always listening to my conscience, trusting that it will lead me on the right path.  To me success does not mean power, wealth or even having a good job.  Success to me is knowing that I have the power within myself to avoid temptations, to give myself freely to others, to know that I can sacrifice my own happiness to bring joy into someone else’s life.  Most people only think with their heads, doing what is best only for themselves and those whom they care about which can bring them wonderful things in life that will make them very happy.  I believe that two hearts beat stronger than one.  What most don’t realize is that by sacrificing your own desires in order to bring help or joy into another’s life, you are blessed with double the happiness.  I do believe that a lot of decisions need to be made with equal parts head and heart; however, if I had to choose, I would follow my heart!

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